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           damn not now!!!

What three words are most likely to strike panic when you making sex?Honey I'm home.

poor old preist:

What do a Christmas tree and a priest have in common?

Their balls are just for decoration.

sex and the hand:

Why is sex like a bridge game?

You don't need a partner if you have a good hand.

UNDERSTANDING WOMEN (best fuckin joke ever):

I know I'm not going to understand women. I'll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax, pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the roots, and still be afraid of a spider.

dont mess with a woman:

"Cash, check or charge?" I asked, after bagging items the woman wished to purchase. As she fumbled for her wallet I noticed a TV remote in her purse. "So, do you always carry your TV remote?" I asked. "No," she replied, "but my husband refused to come shopping with me, so I figured this was the most legal evil thing I could do to him."

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